60 days into 2012

So, we are now 60 days into 2012. This year so far has been quite a whirlwind of emotional ups and downs.

Habakkuk 3:18 yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior.

Strong Enough by Matthew West

You must
You must think I'm strong
To give me what I'm going through
Well, forgive me
Forgive me if I'm wrong
But this looks like more than I can do
On my own

I know I'm not strong enough to be
Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not strong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough, strong enough
For both of us

Well maybe
Maybe that's the point
To reach the point of giving up
Cause when I'm finally
Finally at rock bottom
That's when I start looking up
And reaching out

I know I'm not strong enough to be
Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not strong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough, strong enough

Cause I'm broken down to nothing
But I'm still holding on to one thing
You are God and you are strong when
I am weak

I can do all things through Christ who
Gives me strength
And i don't have to be strong enough (2x)

I know I'm not strong enough to be
Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not strong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough, strong enough
(fade to end)
[- From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/m/matthew-west-lyrics/strong-enough-lyrics.html -]

Monsters Inc: Fighting the Monsters Within You

I have learned that when bad things happen to you, you have two choices. You can become bitter and angry at God and the world or you can become better and stronger. I choose to become better. There are monsters all around us that want to steal our joy: impatience, hurt, anger, envy, bitterness, greed, loneliness, guilt, etc. The trick is to call them out and find ways to combat them. I find that worship music, the old hymns, really helps me.

You have to tell the voices in your head, that seem so loud, to be quiet.  I wish it wasn't so hard. I find myself failing a lot. I have found that if you are not careful that impatience can turn into anger, angry can turn into bitterness, and bitterness turns into envy. Envy is a horrible emotion. Envy not only steals your joy, but it robs you of feeling joy for someone else.  Guilt speaks loudly in your ear when you are alone.  What did I do wrong?  You go through every moment in your mind and wonder what you could have done differently.  The Devil would love it if I gave in and let him win.  He would love it if I got anger at God and walked away from His love.

I have chosen to lean in to what God is teaching me. If we don't learn something during life's trials, then the situation was wasted. It had no purpose. What is God trying to teach me? I don't know that yet. Even when I feel alone and just want to scream, God is there. While I try and find an explanation, God is there telling me He has it under control. Have I hit the acceptance stage? Hardly. Do I feel better today than I did yesterday? Yes, so far.

I am choosing to become better. I am choosing to move forward and not live in the past.  I am choosing not to let the monsters steal my joy for one more day.

2 Cor. 12:9-10: My Grace is Sufficient For You

2 Cor. 12:9-10
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Philippians 3:12-14
I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it,d but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.

Do I truly believe this? I am made stronger in weakness.  Jeremiah 29:11 - "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." It sounds good and I want it to be true.  But do I really believe it? I am looking forward to God's plan for us this year.  The best is yet to come.
Psalm 40:5

Isaiah 40:31: They will walk and not become weary

* Yet those who wait for the LORD Will gain new strength; They will mount up with wings like eagles, They will run and not get tired, They will walk and not become weary. Isaiah 40:31

CONTENT; CONTENTMENT
kon-tent', kon-tent'-ment (ya`al; arkeo): To be free from care because of satisfaction with what is already one's own. The Hebrew means simply "to be pleased." The Greek brings out the full force of the word in 1 Timothy 6:8 Hebrews 13:5. Contentment (1 Timothy 6:6) is more inward than satisfaction; the former is a habit or permanent state of mind, the latter has to do with some particular occurrence or object.

* But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. 1 Timothy 6:6-8

* I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:11-13

You're Still God by Kathy Troccoli

You're Still God by Kathy Troccoli

Jesus,I love you
And I believe all that you've said.
I know your promises,they are true
Beyond my questions
And times when I just don't understand
Help me remember Lord
The answer's in your hands
So I sit at your feet and I listen
For your ways are much higher then mine

Do what you want to do,I give my all to you
Whatever you ask of me
Lord fill me with your grace.
Do what you got to do,I surrender my life to you.
I'm never whitout a prayer.
You're hope inside my heart.
I know you're still God

Jesus,I need you
I have been wandering in the dark.
Whenever I call your name
There you are
You have been faithful
Even when I have I have turned away.
I've seen your mercy
Always light my way.
So I sit at your feet and I listen
For your ways are much higher then mine.

Every storm you lead me trough
I will put my trust in you
Give me grace to carry on

Therefore Encourage One Another...

1 Thessalonians 5:11: Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

Throughout my years of middle school ministry, I have received many notes of encouragement from students and my fellow leaders.  I can not begin to say how much those mean to me.  I still have many of the notes on display around the house and in my Bible.  I am going to take them with me and keep them close as we continue to make plans to move.  One of the hardest parts of the thought of moving is knowing how many close friends I'm going to leave behind.  This is my way to bring you with me.  I hope that I continue to live up to the words they wrote.

Here are just a few:

• "I loved leading with you this year. You are a great person." - Naomi
• "I love your heart for kids. You shine...my friend...you shine." - Judy
• "You always are so happy. Thank you for encouraging others and my children." - Laura
• "I love your positive attitude & the joy that you carry with you always. Love ya sis." - Judy
• "You have a heart for God and it's been a joy watching you on your walk with Christ." - Jason
• "You have a great memory for names. Good way to love our kids." - Adam
• "How faithful & awesome you are. You have been a part of Oasis longer than I have. How special you make our events." - Chris
• "You rock, my friend. I have known ya for...well a long time and you have always have the same sweet smile & friendly lovable personality." - Loretta
• "You are awesome leader. You have taught me so much." - Dianna
• "It's great being a leader with you. You have so much insight. Thanks for all your wisdom." - Carole
• "Your dedication to Oasis is so appreciated." - Wendy
• "Hey gurl, I love you & you are a great girl. I hope you will always be here & I can count on you. Love you tons." - Jeanette